What is love?

There are three different types of love:

Romantic love can be fun, exciting and entertaining.  It can keep you in a state of delirious happiness but if something goes wrong it can plunge you into despair with highs/lows, like being on drugs.

Addictive love is becoming addicted to the thought of a romantic love learned from family, friends, books and T.V.  Which all portray that if you lost the person you love it would be a tragedy.  This type of love can manifest itself in possessive, jealous and even violent behaviour.

Nurturing love.  This indicates a healthy, mutual respect, trust, caring and sharing between two people.  This type of love is how it should be but in a relationship with an abusive partner it is unlikely to happen.

If you think you love the person abusing you it’s because you are made to think that way.  You’re worn down and confused.  If you get out of the abusive relationship you will probably begin to miss the abuser and think you need them because you love them so much. 

With romantic and addictive love, you can develop inflated views of their abilities, your lack of self-esteem, putting them on a pedestal.  But when you are beginning to feel good about yourself you will realise that you are in love with the idea of being in love rather than the actual person.  Life at this point will start to get a lot easier, self confidence will build, you are able to start to take control of your own life and well being.  

 

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